Last night at work Dan was asking what supplies he needed to grab before he came behind the bar.

Dan: Do we need any fruit?
Me: Just limes and apples. And we're okay on juice.
Dan: Did you just say we were okay on Jews?
Me: No. Juice. We're fine on Jews. You've got me.

Then this morning I was talking to Kel and mentioned my craving for bagels and lox.

Kel: Oh Josh. You're so Jewish.
Me: I'm just saying.
Kel: I've never had it.
Me: Well I'll have to take you out for it sometime.
Kel: Doesn't it have cream cheese? I don't do cream cheese.
Me: But it doesn't have to have cream cheese. You can put tomatoes and onions on it. Or capers.
Kel: Like a little Jewish burger.
Me: (pause) Yes. Like a Jewish burger.

I bet Moses never had to have these kinds of conversations.