This morning Kel and I were out to breakfast and the ketchup was refusing to come out of the bottle. "Here, let me try," she said, taking the ketchup from me, as if I was shaking it wrong. It still refused to pour. "This is the world's most difficult ketchup," I said. Kel paused a moment and looked around. "Maybe we're on an episode of Punk'd." I rolled my eyes. "That would be the most pathetic episode of Punk'd," I told her. "Ashton would have to be pretty desperate."

But I'm telling you, if I see a new episode of Punk'd where Usher can't get the ketchup to come out of the bottle I'll know where Ashton stole it from.