Last night I had eaten some particularly bad "vegan friendly!" chicken strips.

"I've had good fake chicken before," I told my aunt, who called up me shortly after I had eaten said fake chicken, "but this stuff really isn't sitting well in my stomach."

"Let me give you a little pearl of wisdom," my aunt said. "This too shall pass."

She paused, reflectively, then added: "Hopefully through your digestive system at a relatively quick rate."